Ups and Downs

Recent frustrations:

• The fact that I took the stupid-ass PTCB test, received the pharmacy technician license, and now can't find a job anywhere. I've tried following up with Riverside's HEB, Walgreens, and CVS Pharmacy weekly, and they always seem to have an excuse to turn me away - "oh, we just hired two new pharm techs a week ago" or "the manager's not in right now". A told me that the key is persistence and timing, but I'm running out of time and I can only be persistent for so long before it gets downright annoying...
• Recommendation letters. This is tied in with my lack of work experience. I have two professors and my academic adviser who are willing to write letters of recommendation for me, but I don't know any pharmacists...
• The application is due on November 1st. I'm not ready at all. I'm not ready. I don't want to submit it in yet. I don't know if I'm ready to be thrown in there and judged and interviewed. My personal statement is bullshit. My resume is stupid. I'm really scared; I don't want to stay here for an extra year...
• Philosophy of the Arts is a very stupid class. And stupidly enough, my only two grades in that class are B's, which makes me angrier at myself. I don't know what they expect from me! I wish I could be more... I dunno, artsy, I guess. I really do want all A's this semester.
• My mom is lonely and keeps calling/txting me to the point where it's practically spam now. I wish I could help out, but I, uhm... do have a life. Haha. My dad's coming back soon though, hopefully she'll stop yelling at me for not calling her more frequently.

And now the ups:

• I am really enjoying Organic Chemistry and Rhetoric of Satire classes, as weird as that might sound. I'm almost disappointed whenever the hour is up... I'm surprised at myself, I've never particularly enjoyed any of my classes last year. But I think it's because my professors are awesome and make class fun.
• Honestly, I have been quite happy lately, despite freaking out over PharmCAS stuff. I guess I can thank the guy I'm dating right now who is fun and smart, and the friends who invite me to cool events, and UT for providing free food and swag. I've always enjoyed college life so much more than high school life, but now I just really feel like it's the environment I belong in. Part of the reason is because of all that sweet freedom and independence - I do whatever I want, whenever I want, and it's pretty fucking awesome. Even better because my parents won't be on my back either.

Anyway, tonight I have an Organic Chemistry study session with J, and then I'm going out to eat at Buca di Beppo with Rudester and Jelly, to celebrate the end of our "Round I" midterms. I'm really looking forward to the weekend too - can't wait for Ramen Tatsuya with A and M! :)

Gimme some of that sweet sweet cat-lovin'!